Lucky

We've had a couple of reactions recently that have sat rather uncomfortably with me, although to all intents and purposes they were positive, and it's mainly around the use of the word "lucky". Someone in our hairdressers who knew of our journey to foster said what a lucky boy Jack-Jack was the other day, and this morning at church a lady became quite emotional when she realised that he was a looked-after child, and said more than once how lucky he is. (We don't generally go around telling people that we're foster carers, but we've decided that at church we will be honest as we're hoping to go there regularly long term, and they will find out eventually if we keep turning up with different children!)

This child is many lovely things, but he certainly isn't lucky. He's been taken away from his mother with no notice or explanation, experienced things that no child should have to experience, and is currently living with strangers. He will in all likelihood have to go through another major upheaval to move to his forever family, once he's settled, attached and happy here.

I know that it's a common thing to say, there's certainly no malice behind it, and people mean well, but I do think that there's some serious education to be done to separate the idea of "lucky" from adopting and fostering.